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Hindsight is really 20/20.

For the past four months, I have been working on the second draft of the book I am writing about raising Nick.  I have such compassion for the young mother that I was.  I am astounded at the things that I have been able to do over the years.  I am very grateful that I kept a journal.  I didn’t write every day, but I wrote often enough that reading the entries takes me back immediately to the experience and the emotions I was feeling.

At the time, I didn’t have much confidence in myself.  I was unsure of my abilities to take care of Nick with all of his health and behaviour issues.  I continually read books and consulted with experts in order to learn all that I could.  I still didn’t feel that I could do it.

A friend recently asked me what I would say to my younger self if I had the opportunity to travel back in time and sit down with her over a cup of herbal tea.  (Or a chocolate brownie sundae, whichever would be more comforting!)

First I would tell myself that everything will be ok.  Even the hard things will eventually turn out to be ok.  Second I would tell myself to do everything each day that is possible to do and then be grateful at night for what was done.  I would say that it is a waste of time and energy to worry about those things that didn’t get done.  Put it on the list for the next day if it is truly important.  Third I would tell myself to hug others more and laugh more.  Find joy every day.

I don’t know if my younger self would have listened but currently my 60-year old self knows how important these things are.  I wonder what my 80 year old self would say to me today if she could come and sit with me right now.  I find it an interesting thought to ponder.  Try it.  Write down the thoughts that come to you.

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2 Comments

  1. Eva, This post really made me think about the direction of my life. I’m glad you have this blog to share your insights.

  2. Eva, Great blog post. I wish I had kept a journal with 5 children under 5 and everything I went through. I’m reading a book by Tara Mohr – Playing Big and it talks about the same sort of things you said above about what would you say to yourself if you could meet now. It’s interesting. I used to try to control so much of my environment and then realized I didn’t need to do that. Hindsight…..

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Announcing that I have finished a book with the working title of “The Fairy Fort.” I am currently pitching it to publishers. Keep checking back to watch the progress of my newest novel.

Here is a quick glimpse of the story.

Sarah Doherty is an 18-year-old living in rural Ireland at the tail end of the Great War. Plagued by severe epilepsy, she is protected by her parents and lives a sheltered, secluded, lonely life. The Fae, local Irish fairies, interfere with her life. She falls forward a century in time through the local fairy fort of standing stones. She had a seizure in 1918 and woke up in 2020. The 21st century world includes life-saving prescriptions, physical comforts and the independence and freedom she seeks. The locals are welcoming and Andy Mclaughlin, a handsome young historian, is intriguing. She doesn’t want to return home.

Then a letter arrives from Boston divulging the story of Sarah and Andy’s lives that are deeply entwined in the previous century. They are not yet in love but as they seek to verify the letter through online resources, they feel a growing obligation to their unborn family and to each other. What would happen to their posterity living in Boston if they don’t return to 1918? Even if they do make it back, her parents can never know what happened to her or that would change everything.

This Young Adult time-travel romance explores the question: Do we have the freedom to make choices or is free will an elaborate illusion?

This is my third book. I love reading time travel romances. I am an advocate for epilepsy awareness because my 43-year-old son has intractable epilepsy. As a genealogist specializing in Irish research, I live part of the year in the village where the story is based. I wrote the book to help young adults understand that difficult situations can change your life. Sometimes miraculously.